dream a little dream

M.I.A

hey :)
currently at Naddy's place. Smth's wrong with my computer.

So, schl has ended. it didn't end as awesome as it did last year. Last day of schl, they argued. We argued. Argued like we were never friends before. if you get what i mean. it was horrible. i cried. we cried. yes, i'm a fucking crybaby. SO WHAT. it's horrible to see your friendship breaking apart right infront of your eyes. very horrible. & sad. i hope you'll be happy with your decision. dont go like " memang aku happy ngan desicion aku. " i'm being sad over here so you be sad too okay. aing. up to you lah nk kate pape. i hope you know who you are. i'm gonna miss hope 2-2. hehe, sounds like we've graduated from schl already. i'm gonna miss being with you guys, PRA. all of us changed. i'm sorry for everything. like what you said, " it's too late. " but i hope that the fact that i still care for you guys will be in your head. :) i just didn't expect that we will be like this. Remember we used to say, " bila-bila pra punya .. pra sistalurb .. bestfriends forever .. forever pra .. we're never gonna seperate .. " blahblahblah. haha, now it's like empty words, right ? none of it happened.

so yeah. " the best of friends becoming the worst of enemies. "

well, i'm not gonna blog for awhile. i'm gonna " menghilangkan diri. " :) hehe, if that's even possible. which it is. hopefully the holidays will be awesome. bye, love you guys. xoxo

Labels: pra. syg krg selalu.

Friday, October 29, 2010

4:55 PM

falling apart

whoa, been a few days since i've updated huh.
eoy is finally o-v-e-r :)
but there's still the results.
don't really think mine will be as awesome as i thought it would be.
since i didn't study (only last min revisions).
Eversince the mid-year parent-teacher thingy,
PRA planned to study real hard for eoy.
hah, didn't think it went well though.
well, that's what i think.
oh & PRA. slowly falling apart.
i don't know whether to be mad at myself, those people or the world.
i wish the results are out & mine are awesome & the holidays started already.
i'm planning to disappear. HAH!
but i still wanna go out with people.
i wonder what's wrong with me.

tmrw there's school. & i heard we're getting back results tmrw ?
what the fuck i'm not ready.
all i'm ready for is seeing suckish marks on my papers. (Y)
hope it won't be so heart-aching.
hope tmrw will not be getting back results.

i hope all of these bullshit will end soon.
'cause i miss being crazy around you guys.
we're not the old us anymore.
if we still are, that's good.

xoxo.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

12:33 PM

we just need to slow down.

today's paper was mt paper 2 & science .
maths paper 1 was fucking difficult .
maybe because i'm too dumb & i can't absorb maths into my head
or
maybe because i keep talking/listening to music in class.
most probably both .

i've been so pissed off lately .
i feel like poking her eyes out & feed 'em to the piranhas .
& then maybe cut her up into a million pieces & it'll be dessert for the piranhas .
god, i don't know where to throw my anger at .

& now my dad's pissing me off . :B
i feel like screaming in this house .
fuck fuck fuck . *clenches teeth*
& they're ruining my plans .
i've got plans & they're ruining it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fuck . i really do deserve a break, y'know .
well, not really . i've not been studying .
but my head's gonna burst anytime soon .
i need space, pleeeeeez .

OH & Glee's starting at 10 :)
heh, kay now happy .
no i am not weird .
my mood do change anytime i want it too okay .
i think my english is getting worse .
i think i've got no more hope in english .
i think i'm giving up in english .
i can't read . i want to .
my head won't let me read .
screw you dumb head . well, it is my head .
i feel so dumb right now . & hopeless .
i just can't wait for friday .
last paper . maths paper 2 .
LEPAK SEPUAS2 NYE .

Labels: devastated.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

9:28 PM

looks like a solo tonight.

recalling the past,
thinking of what a fool i've become.

i think i'm slowly breaking down.
maybe it's just because of end-years.
but i think it's because of us.
just the thought of it can make me cry.
i hope after end-years everything will be alright.
or maybe i'm just going crazy.
i trust people too easily.
that is not good.

i'm speechless of what i've heard & noticed.
but i can't do anything abt it.
so yeah.
but i hope people are happy for what they've chosen. :)

anyway, today had el & mt oral .
it was okay except for mt . :B
tmrw's el & mt paper 1.

sigh.

a lot of things have been going thru my mind.
& it sometimes won't let me read.
the thoughts are trapped in my head
& i can't do anything abt it.
it's slowly killing me.
no, it's not a freaking headache & panadols won't help fuck you.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

8:50 PM

butterfly fly away

so hey. haha, my abortion post.
anw, tmrw's monday.
i've not studied. because i lost my pen !!!!!!!!!!!!
- cries like a baby. -
what the fuck.

i don't know what to do right now.
i can't sleep 'cause i slept in the afternoon like a pig already.
i'm wide awake.
i feel like i'm gonna be sick. :(
my head has been hurting the whole day.
wonder how i manage.
oh, & my picture's senget because i mls nk rotate.
tk tanye kan ? i bilang je. :)
tk interested, tu kaw nye psl.
night.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

11:18 PM

Abortion.

imagine this.
you know yourself you hadn't made any sins.
yes, you're an innocent angel from above.
you thought the world was gonna be a wonderful awesomeland.
suddenly, you felt pain.
agony. you're screaming in agony. but nobody could hear you.
all you can do is scream & scream & cry.
something is pulling your limbs apart.
there's so much blood. you can't do anything now.
the harder the thing is pulling, the louder you scream.
& your legs aren't attached to your body any longer.
you feel so hopeless. so lifeless. so weak.
you're slowly dying.

how would you feel ?
that's abortion.
& to me, abortion is murder.

so if you're telling me, " it's my choice if i want to abort. "
yeah, it is. bet you didn't think abt it.
you're killing an innocent thing.
if you say, " but i don't know what to do. my parents would kill me. "
THEN WHY THE FUCK DID YOU GET YOURSELF FUCKED, right ?
ok, let's not get to that point.

i'm posting abt abortion not because i'm pregnant.
it was because i got bored & i searched abt stuff.
& before i searched abt abortions, i searched abt mermaids, sirens & those mythical sea creatures.
heh heh.

i just think abortion is cruel, it's murder.
i think it's homicide, y'know.
that's the reason why i'm posting this.

if you've got no choice ..
maybe give it for adoption ?
at least adoption sounds better than abortion. :)

& if you're against on what i've posted,
hey, so what if i'm 13 going 14 this year ? i can get a chance to speak. :)
yeah, it's none of my business. i'm just sharing my thoughts.
not interested ? shut the fuck up & get the hell out of my blog.

1:43 PM

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